Attachment. This is the difference between hoping for something and feeling the essence of hope.
When we hope for a particular outcome, we are wanting to control something outside ourselves. We set ourselves up for disappointment if it doesn't come to pass as we want it to; and if it does we enjoy the results of that instance, but happiness from this source is fleeting and not controlled as it may seem, which will eventually lead to the disappointment option.
Attachment to an outcome is a form of judgment. If this thing happens, it will be good, but if that one happens it's bad. On the other hand, if we accept things as they are in advance, we're free from the anxiety of waiting for the future to bring us the good or the bad. We will respond as best we can to the gifts and challenges that come. We're in this moment, in acceptance.
When we hope for a particular outcome, we are wanting to control something outside ourselves. We set ourselves up for disappointment if it doesn't come to pass as we want it to; and if it does we enjoy the results of that instance, but happiness from this source is fleeting and not controlled as it may seem, which will eventually lead to the disappointment option.
Attachment to an outcome is a form of judgment. If this thing happens, it will be good, but if that one happens it's bad. On the other hand, if we accept things as they are in advance, we're free from the anxiety of waiting for the future to bring us the good or the bad. We will respond as best we can to the gifts and challenges that come. We're in this moment, in acceptance.
This is embracing the space between the question and the answer, between the impulse and the response, the here-we-are and the are-we-there-yet?. Sometimes it's this waiting, this pause where people often experience anxiety because it's unfamiliar to those who are conditioned to go-go-go, keep pushing, keep running, be busy, be productive, don't stop... or it will all catch up to you.
It is this moment in which we are blessed. We don't have to wait for it to come, to deny ourselves the richness of now, whatever it is. It's okay to let the past catch up. It's just the past. Process it and let it go. And do it again. In the now.
This doesn't mean that we don't have opinions, wishes, desires, disappointments or triumphs. These are healthy human emotions. But hope isn't necessarily synonymous with any of these things. We can still be discriminating in our focus. We can exercise our free will and take action in the direction of choices that we decide are for our greatest good and the greatest good of all. We can listen for divine guidance to help us make choices.
Hoping for something is more a function of ego than soul, but we also don't need to judge ourselves for hoping! It just happens sometimes and we can learn from that too. These emotions or spiritual sensations are part of the normal range of human experiences and are not unrealistic or naive. In fact, they are vital to our well-being. The opposite of hope is despair. No one wants to be without hope. Hopelessness is not a great motivator for positive change. It leads to depression, helplessness and complacency, none of which seem to be in short supply in our world.
Hope itself is a sensation like inspiration or ecstasy or enthusiasm in that it is not tied to a specific circumstance that is judged good or bad, it is simply an experience that goes beyond mere emotion to connect us to a deeper place in our hearts and spirits, a place in our core, yet beyond ourselves. Hope is more instinct than emotion, for it draws us on in life even when we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. In this way it is kin to faith and at a very basic level, it's the spark of life, the urge to survive and go beyond surviving to thrive and to nurture others and to create and to fulfill our potential and to risk the unknown for the chance that it may be an improvement.
I love* the following poem by T. S. Eliot, almost without knowing why. I understand it, yet I also embrace it's impossibility. It's a beautiful Mobius strip of reasoning and deep feeling, almost more of a question than an answer, yet it responds to the experience of deep longing – but, exquisitely, ultimately, thankfully, without extinguishing the perfectly valid experience of longing itself!
I said to my soul, be still, and wait without hope
For hope would be hope for the wrong thing; wait without love
For love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faith
But the faith and the love and the hope are all in the waiting.**
Do I hope you have enjoyed my essay? Emotionally, yes, I suppose I do, although I also welcome feedback, questioning, challenges and additional insights, so feel free to continue the conversation and add a comment!
*”Love”! What's that? Well, another time...
** excerpt from “East Coker” from “The Four Quartets” found at http://oedipa.tripod.com/eliot-2.html. I recommend reading at least this whole passage.
It is this moment in which we are blessed. We don't have to wait for it to come, to deny ourselves the richness of now, whatever it is. It's okay to let the past catch up. It's just the past. Process it and let it go. And do it again. In the now.
This doesn't mean that we don't have opinions, wishes, desires, disappointments or triumphs. These are healthy human emotions. But hope isn't necessarily synonymous with any of these things. We can still be discriminating in our focus. We can exercise our free will and take action in the direction of choices that we decide are for our greatest good and the greatest good of all. We can listen for divine guidance to help us make choices.
Hoping for something is more a function of ego than soul, but we also don't need to judge ourselves for hoping! It just happens sometimes and we can learn from that too. These emotions or spiritual sensations are part of the normal range of human experiences and are not unrealistic or naive. In fact, they are vital to our well-being. The opposite of hope is despair. No one wants to be without hope. Hopelessness is not a great motivator for positive change. It leads to depression, helplessness and complacency, none of which seem to be in short supply in our world.
Hope itself is a sensation like inspiration or ecstasy or enthusiasm in that it is not tied to a specific circumstance that is judged good or bad, it is simply an experience that goes beyond mere emotion to connect us to a deeper place in our hearts and spirits, a place in our core, yet beyond ourselves. Hope is more instinct than emotion, for it draws us on in life even when we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. In this way it is kin to faith and at a very basic level, it's the spark of life, the urge to survive and go beyond surviving to thrive and to nurture others and to create and to fulfill our potential and to risk the unknown for the chance that it may be an improvement.
I love* the following poem by T. S. Eliot, almost without knowing why. I understand it, yet I also embrace it's impossibility. It's a beautiful Mobius strip of reasoning and deep feeling, almost more of a question than an answer, yet it responds to the experience of deep longing – but, exquisitely, ultimately, thankfully, without extinguishing the perfectly valid experience of longing itself!
I said to my soul, be still, and wait without hope
For hope would be hope for the wrong thing; wait without love
For love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faith
But the faith and the love and the hope are all in the waiting.**
Do I hope you have enjoyed my essay? Emotionally, yes, I suppose I do, although I also welcome feedback, questioning, challenges and additional insights, so feel free to continue the conversation and add a comment!
*”Love”! What's that? Well, another time...
** excerpt from “East Coker” from “The Four Quartets” found at http://oedipa.tripod.com/eliot-2.html. I recommend reading at least this whole passage.